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When you answer and send emails 6 days a week about music, venues and Jake Stone, there’s a certain obliviousness that forms as you work. An obliviousness to the fact that on a linguistic level your entire email inbox is complete gibberish. I’ve been doing this stuff only for about a year now but I’ve only just today had a moment of lucidity, and I’m glad to say that it was an email titled “Article on Jaws presents Bears With Guns, Main Beach & Montes Jura”that gave me this reason for pause.

bears with guns

Happy Presents: An overly detailed explanation of “Jaws presents: Bears With Guns, Montes Jura and Main Beach”

Sometimes you just need to break it down into little chunks to get to the bottom of the convoluted language that is music industry emails. JAWS in this instance does not mean mandible, nor does it refer to the successful ’75 film concerning insufficient boat size. It is an event, hosted by some of Sydney’s most on point party people with a nose for good tunes and an ear for solid lineups. Last week, they presented to us a lineup headlined by Richard In Your Mind, alongside some appropriately awesome psych bands, all for free and all down beneath a Bondi Laundromat at a little venue called Jam Gallery. Needless to say, it was sick.

Bears With Guns, it does not mean that the event is providing projectile weaponry to large, furry North American animals. It means that they are funding the appearance of a band with the stage name of Bears With Guns, which is likely a play on a phrase in the third amendment to the constitution of the United States of America, commonly paraphrased as “The Right To Bear Arms.” They play folky, poppy sort of tunes, not dissimilar to other bands with the word ‘bear’ in them, and according to many sources, they “go alright aye”.

Likewise, the nary experienced might be fooled into thinking that Main Beach & Montes Jura are locations, or at least in the case of the former. The venue is in Bondi after all, a suburb noted for it’s waterfront locale. This is wrong on both counts, as the venue is in the landlocked suburb of Bondi Junction, home to the strange public transport phenomenon of queuing up for buses (seriously, what is up with that), and more importantly because both are also stage names for performing troupes of musicians.

Main Beach (as in hindsight you may have already worked out) are a vaguely surfy, vaguely poppy, vaguely doley, vaguely amazing guitar band, who sing songs about kissing girls on beaches. They’re great, and they have an amazing album that we premiered not too long ago, which you should go and listen to here. Montes Jura might need a little more explanation however, because it may be assumed that the Latin American moniker that they go by in fact refers not to the hills of the Andes but to the hills overlooking the Sea of Tranquility. As such, they’re a dusty, low gravity psych band who still have Neil Armstrong’s boot print in their face.

Put it all together and what do you have? Jaws presents Bears With Guns, Main Beach & Montes Jura. An awesome, cheap, hopefully burger-fuelled night of live music revelry. Head down to Jam Gallery this Friday and enjoy.

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October 9, 2014

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